Making It Last Forever

Forever Was a Daunting Prospect

Forever was a daunting prospect. When my husband proposed 14 years ago, it wasn’t marriage that I couldn’t fathom. It was that it would actually last.

In my family, the only thing more popular than marriage, was re-marriage. Out of more than a dozen marriages in my family, only my parents remained with their original spouses.

So a white dress, cake and ring weren’t the stuff of fairy tales for me. I fully expected marriage would happen for me just as it had for all of my family members. I couldn’t grasp how we could defy the odds that had doomed so many marriages before us.

My husband and I reached what I thought then was a solution. I could handle it if we broke the whole “til death do us part” down into seven year chunks with an option for renewal. That worked while the times were mostly sunny. But as is inevitable in every marriage a storm came, and it taught me the secret to a lasting marriage. It wasn’t compatibility, or maturity or any of those other things the self-help gurus preach. Instead it was God.

As I grew closer in my relationship to God by reading my Bible, praying, and spending time with other believers, something happened to me. I became more of the woman my husband needed me to be, and as he did the same he began to change as well. We still aren’t perfect (I still on occasion nag, and he still won’t put the seat down). But we love each other in a deeper and more complete way because we’ve realized that on our own seven years was all we could do, but with God forever is possible.

- Kim

Forever is a Long, Perilous Journey

Forever. That word conjures up so many emotions that you would need a 6-core processor in your heart to make sense of them. When I was younger, I believed that getting to forever was as simple as saying, “I do.”  I thought I could simply buy a ring, propose, and waltz into marital bliss.

I was wrong.

Experience has taught me that it last forever is a long, perilous journey. Getting married is the simple part. Staying married takes work. But nothing worthwhile is ever easy, and making our marriage last is definitely worthwhile.

Over the years, Kim and I have had some serious struggles during our marriage. We’ve even used the D-word. Sometimes it seemed easier to just throw in the towel. But those struggles are what made our marriage stronger. They intensified our love and devotion. Divorce is no longer an option. We will settle for nothing less than forever.

I will admit that getting to forever seems impossible at times and I get a little scared.

What if we don’t make it?

What if it’s too hard?

It is during these times of doubt and frustration that I seek the Lord. His words, “I will never leave you nor forsake you,” give me comfort.

But I also find comfort in my wife. All she has to do is flash a smile my way and I know everything will be alright.

Forever may seem daunting, but taking this journey with the woman I love makes it enjoyable. And I plan to enjoy every moment.

- Fred

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